Day 3

So tired…..but I gotta do it.

Calories: 1549

Forget the ratios today.

Halloween was fun.

Also, had late night snack-attack last night which put me up to just under 2000 calories (I think 1987?). So yeah, there’s that…..but still at a regular calorie count, by no means a binge or anything. Just higher than I’d like.

Today was spot on though. And I haven’t eaten one bite of candy! I know!!!

Guess what I’m doing tomorrow? If you guessed boxing, then you know me too well…..;)

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Day 2 Tracking

Hey lovelies! Another great day! I had art this morning, then I came home, did some homework (I kept telling J, “Just pretend I’m not here”, yeah right…), then we had so much fun! We painted pumpkins. The Little One and J got (washable) paint everywhere and I didn’t even mind. Then I showed J what I learned in art: perspective. I showed him how to put the perspective points on the paper, then use the ruler to create 3D stuff. We drew a big cube with square cut-outs and turret/tower things. We were so into it! Then J and I played Uno. J is just like his mama in a lot of ways. He hates hates hates not being #1. I have to admit to being a sore loser. I’ve had to learn to be nice when I’m losing and be gracious when winning. I find both difficult. I’m much better than I used to be, and I probably did exactly what J did today when I was 7. He had a huge freaking meltdown when he wasn’t winning (he’d won the last 3 times, the stinker!). What was kinda cute though, yet pathetic, was that I kept asking him if he wanted to keep playing and he’d answer, through tears, “Yes!!!”.

Dinner was fun too. Somehow the idea popped into my head on the drive home after art: Candlelight dinner! So we turned off the tv (which is always on at night) and all the lights (except for the super-creepy spider lights!), and lit candles and ate dinner by candlelight! Then we put on a spooky Halloween soundtrack and we were set. Then we had another freak-out when J got totally scared from one song and started crying. Poor kid. He’d been very busy all day playing outside and I think by this time he was exhausted. Then The Little One stood up on his chair in the middle of our dark/spooky dinner and announced, “I love this dinner, mama!!!” So cute. What was for dinner? Here’s my breakdown of the day:

Calories: 1543 (kinda low!)

Ratios: P 14% F 56% C 30%

I am at 113 grams of carbs today. I did the juice again. I can’t resist. But I was pondering, so I flipped through my PB (Primal Blueprint), and it says that a range of 50-100 is the “sweet spot” for weight loss. So according to that philosophy, I’m okay. A little high, I could lose a cucumber or an apple maybe. But I’m really not gonna sweat it. Again, quality over quantity is my concern.

So what did I eat?

-2 mugs coffee with half and half, no sugar

-the juice: cucumber, 2 apples, ginger, 2 leaves of kale, a lemon

-meatloaf: ground beef, almond and coconut flour to bind, eggs, and spices

-roasted cauliflower with this amazing dijon cream sauce (ahmaga!!!) and toasted hazelnuts—Mr. Dawn doesn’t care for cauliflower but he loves it this way!

-2 Polly O string cheeses….I added these after I saw how low my calories were for the day

-2 big mugs of tea: one earl grey with half and half, and one sleepytime with 1 TB honey

I haven’t actually eaten the cheese or that last mug of tea, but soon.

Things have been very hectic, and I’m seriously chomping at the bit to just do all these fantastic goals I have knocking around in my head. But I have to pace myself. I mean, I’m very busy now and I think that if I try to do everything at once, I will spread myself to thin and benefit no one. So…that being said, I’m just going to keep the focus on the tracking for another 5 days or so here. Then we’ll see where I am and what direction I’m heading and what I want to move forward with next.

With that, I bid you, my lovelies, good night. Sweet dreams and all that!

Day 1 Down

Total Calories: 1765

Ratios: Protein=15%, Fat=51%, Carbs=34%

Not so crazy about the level of carbs there, but it’s fully due to the delicious juice. And, as we know with primal eating, it’s not necessarily “low-carb”, but quality of carb. I think for now, as a starting point, it’s good. The fat may look scary, but it’s not. At least not to me. I’ve fully left my “low-fat/no fat” brain in the dust.

I had coffee with half and half (no sugar), “the juice”, roasted chicken and root veggies, and also some leftover chili (straight up, no beans) with cheddar and sour cream. Lots of water, of course, and some herbal tea (SleepyTime) w/ about a TB of honey.

I am planning on beginning full-on workouts Monday. I think it’s enough time for my mouth to heal up a little so I won’t cry like a little girl if I take on on the chin at boxing. Can’t wait to get back into the groove. However long it lasts. Seems like I can’t catch a break with boxing. If it’s not one thing, it’s another. Not gonna stop me though!

Tracking

So far, so good. Tracked my coffee and juice today. Oh, the juice. So. Darn. Tasty. I think  I prefer the lemons whole, with the peel on when I toss them in the juicer. I like that essential oil flavor.

So the juice today: 2 ginger gold apples, cored, 1 cucumber, standard with seeds, scrubbed but not peeled, chunk o’ ginger, lemon with peel (just chuck it in, your juicer can take it!), and 2 leaves of kale. The kale was just for nutrition, cuz it don’t taste so nice. I masked it with the sweetness of the apple and the strong flavors of lemon and ginger. Mmmm.

Dinner will be a roasted chicken, with sweet potatoes, turnips, and carrots. Just throwing the hunks of veggies in the pan with the chicken, so they get all the juices from the chicken. Should be a good thing. It’s a nice day to cook with the oven, since our temps finally dropped. It was crazy warm over here the past few days. I was actually going to cook the chicken yesterday, but it was in the 70s, so there was no way I wanted to turn the oven on, especially since I had the windows open already due to the heat blasting from our coal stove.

I’m off to go do mommy stuff. Volunteering every other Friday in J’s class is really fun. I love it. The kids are so cute at this age. Then I have one of those adult toy parties to go to tonight. Should be interesting! Mr. Dawn is fishing this afternoon with a friend. He’s so cute. He calls his buddy and they go on and on about tides and lures and all that fishy-talk. They are like two girlfriends chatting away.

The Little One had a parade at school today. In costume. He’s a super-scary (okay, cute) skeleton this year. It was really really really uber-adorable seeing all the kids. What’s really cute, and sorta pathetic, is seeing when one of the little people is crying or upset with the sad face, and they have the cute costume on. The face doesn’t match the outfit. It’s cute, in a sad way. But The Little One wasn’t sad at all. He stopped at the fence, you know, where all the parents are herded to and ordered to Stay Back, and he saw us and did a little boogey for us. It was so cute and funny.

Goals

“We are what we repeatedly do. Excellence, then, is not an act, but a habit.”—Aristotle

I came across this quote today in The Positivity Blog, and it just jumped out at me. I have been pondering goals for myself. I am thinking I need a goal for nutrition. I think tracking is a good place to start. So, I will track my food starting tomorrow. I’m tentative about going all out on my goals, so let’s just take baby steps and start with that, shall we? Easy, peasy, lemon squeezy! It’s me, striving for excellence, one habit at a time! I am thinking of all sorts of things though. My housekeeping goals, school goals, exercise goals, I could go on and on. But like I said, baby steps.

I got a tooth extracted last night. It really wasn’t bad at all. I was sitting there freaking out, so I started focusing and closed  my eyes and took deep breaths. I was alone waiting for the surgeon to come and yank my tooth, so the mind started to wander to dark, dark places. I just shut. it. down. And then the surgeon was so awesome and friendly, gave me some free career advice, and told me a racy joke to top it all off! Good experience all around. I even called the office today, once I realized I was totally fine and not in any pain, to tell them how much the surgeon rocked. Just paying it forward. But now I look super duper sexy with my big toothless smile. It’s sorta on the side, so it’s not that bad unless I’m grinning. And I do that a lot. Damn. I took some pictures too. But they are not for the squeamish, so I’m sparing you all. Unless you guys are kinda weird like me and like to see that stuff. I know Ag wouldn’t wanna see them! I’m making an appointment tomorrow with my regular dentist and we’ll start figuring out what to do now.

I have been pondering the focus of this blog as well. I’m thinking that this blog isn’t so much “Primal” as it is “Dawn”. You’ve been warned. A change may follow. Of course, I love being primal and all that that entails, I just think that if you are following along for just the primal aspect, you will be sorely disappointed. And I think my title needs to reflect that. I’m open to suggestions as well *wink wink nudge nudge*. I know I have some creative readers out there.

So, my question to you all: Goals? Are you a goal-setter-go-getter? Wanna be? Tell me all about it……heck, you could even join me and commit to just tracking what you eat for a week. Let’s do it!

 

I Present To You, Without Further Ado, The Grand Finale of The 7 Deadly Sins Series

Lust/Love. This post was the hardest for me. It’s the most personal, and I struggled with nailing concrete items down, and whether to reveal certain things or not. Some may judge. Screw them. This list was quite soul-baring for me. I hope that I at least entertain you, if not giving you some things of your own to ponder.

 

Day 7 – Lust. Seven love secrets

1-      I didn’t have my heart truly broken until my early 20s. It sucked. And I’m so glad that guy didn’t last. Still, it hurt like hell.

2-      Other than the guy mentioned in #1, I have always been the dumper, not the dumpee.

3-      I was with a married man for 3 years in my mid-20s. I learned a lot from that relationship. Mainly, I will never allow anyone to undermine my self-esteem the way that that situation did. I see now that I didn’t have enough self-respect to go about a proper relationship. And all the clichés are true. His marriage was basically over by the time I got there, and he did leave his wife for me. But it was too late. The damage had been done, and I didn’t love him anymore after I saw what a coward he was. When someone shows you who they are, see it.

4-      My first crush was probably in 1st grade. A Mexican boy named Rudy that lived in our apartment building.

5-      I’m very free, open-minded. Take that how you wish. I’m of the opinion that there is no black or white in the bedroom and what you do behind closed doors is really up to whoever’s involved. No judgments.

6-      This doesn’t qualify as “lust” as stated in the title up there, but I have never experienced such a full-body, soul-twitching, fierce love as the love I feel for my sons. I would die for them without a second thought. And God help the person who fucks with them.

7-      I believe not really in love at first sight or the usual idea of soul-mates. I think that people come into your life for different reasons, to teach us things, and that they may not last a lifetime, but they are an important part of who you are and your journey on this planet. That said, I do believe you eventually find that person to grow old with. Like Mr. Dawn. You should all get a Mr. Dawn at some point. He’s very handy to have around. And he makes me laugh. That alone will get you major points.

 

Oooooh. The down and dirty on Primal Dawn. Talk amongst yourselves. I need a moment.

7 Deadly Sins Returns!!!

Okay, lovelies, it’s time for Day 6, Gluttony. We are almost finished with this little thing. I’ve had fun with it, I hope you’ve enjoyed reading!

Day 6 – Gluttony. Seven guilty pleasures.

1-      Pizza—I like pepperoni, mushrooms, and black olives. But I’m not picky. It just really needs sauce and cheese.

2-      Reality tv—I miss the days when we had cable. I loved Rock of Love, I Love New York, Flavor of Love, Daisy of Love, Tool Academy, and I Love Money…..*sigh* oh I do miss them. They are so bad they’re good!!!

3-      Books—This one wouldn’t have made the list until September. Since school started, I keep checking great books out of our library here, and I have to bring them back without finishing them. I haven’t finished a non-school related book in months. Sad.

4-      Music—I use music like a drug. For real. I love love love everything. I mostly listen to the hard stuff, metal and industrial or punk. But I own some Britney, love Madonna, and groove to Lady Gaga. I like to have music on most of my day. It can cheer me up, purge the rage, and make me weepy (Hey Jupiter by Tori Amos…every time *sniff sniff*). I also have strong aural memories. Better than photos sometimes. I can hear a song and it will take me back to a time so clearly, it’s like I’m there again. Good stuff.

5-      Pedis—I can’t get manicures because they never last more than a day for me. I hate paying for that. But I have no problem paying someone to deal with my feet. I don’t do it very often, but when I do, I really enjoy it. I live in a house with all boys, so to go to a place where it’s super-girly is fun!!!

6-      Clothing—I love to buy clothes. I don’t even need labels. I just love really funky stuff. Sometimes I worry about dressing age-appropriately. Then I laugh and just go ahead and pull that pink skull tee shirt over my head!! And rock the Chucks. My style is very schizophrenic. One day I’m uber-girly with a sweet little dress and mary-janes. The next, I’m going tomboy in jeans and a fitted tee. It’s all good….and it’s about self-expression.

7-      Lazy Days—They used to be Sundays. We’d all just stay in our jammies and do whatever. Read, watch television, play video games. Now, I’ll take them whenever the universe bestows them on me. Even if that’s a Monday and everyone’s gone. If my schedule is clear, I’m lounging:)

Today is the first day of the week. Which means I’ve officially left last week behind. A really really good thing. Some people dread Mondays. Not me. It gives me a fresh start, a chance to make this week even better and more fulfilling than the last. What are you doing that’s fulfilling this week? How do you improve each week?

7 Deadly Sins….yada yada yada

The. Week. From. Hell.

It all started when the costume party I was going to for Halloween got canceled. Boo. I already bought a costume and everything! Then I missed a dinner out with my girls because  I started having horrible tooth pain. Went to the dentist. I need oral surgery to pull the tooth. So I get me some antibiotics and pain meds. Seriously, I looked like a squirrel, my face was so swollen. So then when I called the surgeon, they couldn’t get me in until the end of November. I was freaking about a possible infection. It’s an upper tooth, and that is really close to one of my favorite things: my brain. I’ve heard bad things about tooth infections that went too far. Those kind of thoughts drove me to the ER. Again. I’m the queen of the emergency room. In all seriousness, though, I have a terrible history of hospitalizations for infection, so I really wanted to get this taken care of. They sent me home with a referral to a different surgeon. On the way home, my windshield got a huge crack in it from a rock that flew up while I was driving on the expressway. Then I woke up this morning, went to throw out the old coffee grounds from yesterday, and somehow tossed them on the floor just in front of the garbage can!!! Yep. That was my week people. A pile of cold, wet, ground-up crap on a dirty floor. Perfect.

However, being the optimist I am, I keep looking for the good. And you know what? Friday it came in the form of J. I had bribed him with a toy in exchange for a good smile for his school pics. Last year’s were….uh….can you say “deer in the headlights”? He hates pictures and gets very anxious and freezes up. Anyway, we got his pictures Friday, so I took him to Toys R Us for his toy. We got into the car, cranked our favorite metal (System of a Down), sang along like rockstars, and chit-chatted away about the most interesting things in my 2nd-grader’s life: his little girl friend, H, and Spiderman. Oh, and birthdays and Christmas. Then when we got in the store, we were checking out all of the board games and goofing around. It was so nice and made me forget my issues for a while. I even told him that I had been having some bad luck lately, and that just hanging out with him made me feel a lot better. You should have seen the smile. Beaming.

Then today I got to go on a field trip for school. This was a self-guided thing for my online geography class. I dragged Mr. Dawn with me. Yep, just me and Mr. Dawn set loose on a gorgeous Sunday afternoon in NYC. We decided to drive in to avoid some construction delays on the trains this weekend. I took a bazillion pictures. My assignment was to take a certain tour of the Tenement Museum. We got in a little early, so we ate at a little diner on the way to the museum. The tour ended up being so much more interesting than I thought it would be. It was all about a neighborhood in NYC that was really the heart of immigration to America. We saw the tenements they lived in, with original walls and stairs and furniture. So cool!!! They even told the stories of two different families, what happened to them and such. Really really interesting. Then we drove back, picked up The Little One from J’s dad’s house, and headed home. It’s nice coming home after gallivanting all over the place. It always feels so cozy.

I do have the next day in the 7 Deadly Sins series ready. But I think I’m going to do a separate post for that. Tomorrow, my lovelies.

I think what I’d like you to take away from this post is that bad days happen to good people, but you don’t have to let them ruin you. I do have to confess to being in borderline freak-out mode  more than a few times. It’s easy to take a “why me” attitude. No pity-parties allowed!!! Did I handle every moment with perfection? Of course not. I do recall uttering the f-word more than a few times. And with 3 months of sobriety under my belt, a drink was looking pretty damn good in the midst of all that crap. But I didn’t do it. I think I may have been yelling at everyone a little more than usual, but hey, I’m the mom, it’s what I do sometimes:) But we all survived. That’s how we roll!

7 Deadly Sins, Day 5

Day 5 – Greed. Seven worldly material desires.

Oh boy…I could have put some of the items on day 1’s list here, but oh well. Somehow, I’m not having an issue with coming up with material things I want! Go figure.

1-      A new car. Specifically, a 2008-11 VW GTI sedan (4 doors), base with a sunroof, or…a Jeep Wrangler, 1995-2003ish. Automatic transmission, unfortunately. This girl grew up with stick-shifts, now I have to give them up due to my shoulder issues. I can drive with one arm on an automatic. Not that you should, necessarily, but hey, you gotta do what you gotta do. Enough with Mr. Dawn or bffs driving this lady around, or even worse, taking days off to drive me around!!

2-      I’m toying with getting a MAC in addition to our current computer arsenal (one laptop, 3 PCs). I’d like to check them out.

3-      I would LOVE to move out of this school district. As it is, we’re dreading…erm….counting down the days til J has to go to high school here. It’s baaaaad. The elementary and middle schools are not so bad, but high school here is no bueno. I also like the idea of moving somewhere new as a family, like a clean, fresh start. Mr. Dawn has lived here forever, and it’d be neat to give the boys their own rooms. And have a dream master suite with a private bathroom. And a two-car garage. And my own office/studio area. A girl can dream. So a new house I guess would be the material thing here.

4-      A serger machine. I’d like to play with one of those and see where my crafty/sewing skills go with that. All the bells and whistles, please!

5-      A brand new kitchen and the stuff that goes in it! Technically that’s two things, but whatever! I love love love getting my chef on, and quality tools make life easier.

6-      College accounts for the boys. Well, we have accounts for the boys, but I mean filled up college accounts!! I hate how expensive and irrelevant a degree in this country has become. To actually become anything or be diverse in this dog-eat-dog world, smart people should actually get multiple degrees in different areas. But how to pay for that? You come out of school over your head in debt, and then you spend how many years paying that off? It’s a racket, I tell ya! And the textbook companies?? Oh, don’t even get me started.

7-       I wanna win the lottery. Seriously. That’s about as material as it gets, no? Wanna know what Primal Dawn would do? I’d become a professional student. I’d just learn and learn and learn. Art classes, foreign languages, philosophy, sociology, women’s studies, molecular biology, physics, chemistry sequences…..I could go on and on. Learning is the bomb diggety yo.

 

Well, I’m off this morning. All of the sudden life has become go-go-go. I got things to do, and people to see!!!